


You and Me

by yamaneko19xx



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Established Relationship, Happy Ending, It may get ooc, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Self indulgent AU, Sorry Not Sorry, kaz is a broken man and ocelot helps him, ocelhira
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-17
Updated: 2016-08-17
Packaged: 2018-08-09 10:04:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7797565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yamaneko19xx/pseuds/yamaneko19xx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaz laughed softly but suddenly talked with a confident voice, with a tone of warning.<br/>“Hey, do you really know what you are doing, Revolver Shalashashka Ocelot?”</p><p>The Russian replied to his taunt with another one “And do you? Commander Miller?”</p><p>A very self indulgent draft about Kaz and Ocelot's decision to live a different life together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You and Me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Alice_aka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alice_aka/gifts).



> I'm going through a hard moment and the only thing that makes me happy is writing fluffy Ocelhira. This is for my friend Alice who supports me a lot and also for all of you who support my work, thank you! 
> 
> One last warning, this gets fluffy.
> 
> (If there's something out of place I'll correct it later)

**You and me**

 

**1985 - Diamond Dogs Mother Base.**

Kaz woke up feeling a hand on his jaw and kisses on his neck. Without opening his eyes he knew who the other person was. His scent was so familiar that it always made him remember home. Because home for him was where _he_  was.

That was how it had been since almost 9 years ago, where the Russian spy rescued him from the mess his life had become when his and Big Boss’s private army fell at the hands of Cipher.

His relationship with Ocelot went from hate to love, whether it would sound _cliché_ or not, it was true. The more they got involved, the more Kaz noted they were very similar, and opposite at the same time, and opposites do attract each other, right? Until there was a time where both realized they couldn’t live apart from one another.

Big Boss, the real one, was back in the shadows. Kaz was grateful he was deeply in love with the infamous Interrogator Specialist. It was crazy, but Ocelot was the only one who could save him from the Hell he had gone through for the sake of Big Boss. Even if both Ocelot and Kaz were still fond of their Boss, it was clear that their love was stronger.  
And the other Big Boss, Venom Snake, knew it before they even got the chance to tell him. It was obvious, how they looked at each other, their marriage-like bickerings and the small, even tiniest details that Snake would notice. Like Ocelot’s concern when Kaz was kidnapped or when Kaz tried not to blush when talking about his lover, specially how he once called him Adam in front of Snake, without realizing the intimacy that using such name implied.

‘ _John’s changed_ ’ was what Ocelot regretted when he told Kaz the truth. On the other hand, Venom Snake still reminded him how Naked Snake used to be, how he was still in love with Kaz and very fond of Adam. But Venom decided to step away, too busy focusing on Big Boss’s dream and on his own issues.

Kaz wanted to help him, though he couldn’t do anything but to do as V wanted, to keep him busy with new contracts to distract his mind, and frankly, that was what the commander tried to do too, for his own mental sake.

 

 

Except on very special moments, when the man kissing and caressing his body was the only man that mattered to him.

“Adam.” He whispered before feeling the older man’s lips on his own, kissing Kaz softly while he put his weight on top of him, taking care not to hurt him.

He was still sleepy but he moved his left hand to touch his lover’s face, touching his cheek and then his lips. There were a few new wrinkles but he was still handsome as hell, even more than 9 years ago. _It must be his genes_ , Kaz thought as he admired his lover's perfect features, sharp and soft at the same time.

“What time is it?” Kaz glanced at his nightstand, trying to take a look at the alarm clock.

Ocelot smiled and moved Kaz’s chin to face him again. “Today there’s nothing assigned, remember? We agreed on taking a break once in awhile.”

That was true, after Skull Face was dealt with and the whole parasyte ordeal was controlled, now they were only focusing on expanding their business. Both Ocelot and Venom convinced Kaz to take a break.

Kaz smiled back leaning his head full on the pillow. “And you’re gonna make me take a break?”

“Yes Commander.” Ocelot kissed his neck. “You work too hard to keep our business going.”

“That’s not true. V’s the one out doing our dirty work. He’s the one who takes the bullets for all of us… And I can’t even hold a rifle alright anymore, isn’t that pathetic?” Kaz laughed while he glanced at his lost right arm.

“Don’t say that again.” Ocelot took his lover’s face with his two hands and gave him a serious look. “You and Venom Snake, no, Big Boss, are a team, you know how much Snake needs you… How much I need you Kazuhira.”

Kaz closed his eyes, he always did that when he felt too shy to express his deepest feelings.  
“And I need _you_ , Adam.”

“I’ll always be here for you.” Ocelot now didn’t hesitate in saying those words out loud. Just like the first time he dared to say  ‘ _I love you_ ’ to Kaz.

Kaz opened his eyes to look at him and then kissed him. He was maybe too needy, too passionate but he didn’t care. Revolver Ocelot still made him feel like kissing him for the first time, sending shivers down his spine but also made him feel safe, at home with the man who, with time, ended up being the most important person in his life.

 

They had had a huge fight some weeks ago, when Ocelot let Kaz know the truth about V. The spy even threatened to kill him, but it was his way of pushing Kaz to agree with the plan.

In the end, Ocelot was the one who got closer to Kaz and they agreed on waiting to see what happened and that they should stay together. Big Boss had to accept that they were involved but he didn’t really care as long as they continued aiding Venom Snake.  
Even so, the truth was they didn’t know how longer they could keep this lie. It wasn’t as if Venom didn’t know the truth, it was the fact that now that Ocelot found someone who really loved him and his love was reciprocal, he questioned himself if he really wanted to leave all behind just for him. Kaz felt the same, his thirst for vengeance and power were nothing compared to the need of having a normal life with his lover, away from all this.

 

 

Maybe that time would come someday.

 

 

Kaz felt Ocelot’s bare hands on his body, running his fingers carefully through his scars while he kissed him, slowly passing his tongue through his open lips while the blonde couldn’t help but gasp and moan at the attention his body was having.

“Why are you so soft to me today?” A smirk appeared on his face while he entangled his fingers on his lover’s silver hair.

“Because I want to make love to you.”

Kaz didn’t respond, he just blushed and looked at his right side again, wishing he had his other arm. Now that he wasn’t focused on revenge he didn’t feel the need to carry on with his pain. The love he felt for the man who was worshipping him at this moment was more important.

How could an ocelot tame a war dog like him?

“Stop joking around and tell me what you want?” Miller’s self defenses would activate whenever strong feelings were involved.

Ocelot grabbed his wrist and pushed him to the mattress. “I told you, didn’t I? I want to make love to you.”  
His usually cold grey eyes were different and a faint blush ran through his cheeks. Kaz smiled and rocked his hips against his as a sign of approval and Ocelot pulled Kaz’s bed shirt up over his head with one hand while he held his left wrist with the other.

Had this been a different moment Kaz would have fighted back, but he relaxed under the other man’s grip and watched how Ocelot removed his pants, exposing him completely.

“You’re beautiful like this, you know? Waiting for me to be inside you.” Ocelot whispered to his ear while Kaz spread his legs, grinding his naked cock on Ocelot’s pants.

“Shut up.” The blonde whispered while he pressed his lips on his lover’s neck and felt him lowering his pants to free his cock too.

Kaz passed his hand on the Russian’s back, pulling his shirt up clearly wanting him to take it off. Ocelot obeyed, tossing both his shirt and scarf on the floor with his boots and weapons.

“But it’s true, you are beautiful Kaz.” Ocelot looked at him blushing while he removed the only piece of cloth left on him, his pants.

Then, to make Kaz be even more embarrassed he went down on him while he gave him slow kisses on his chest, belly and finally giving his cock slow and wet kisses while he put one lubed finger on his entrance, running a circle through his sensitive skin before slowly pushing it inside.

Kaz breathed hard and grabbed the bedsheets while rocking his hips upwards, silently begging Ocelot would put his cock inside his hot mouth.

“A-Adam, please…”

Ocelot couldn’t resist his blonde begging at him like that, so truthful, so in love. He took him in his mouth, moving his head upwards and downwards while Kaz moaned hard. Ocelot didn’t close his eyes, admiring this view of the Diamond Dogs commander, he was the only one who could see him like that.

Kaz didn’t care if someone heard them, they were past that already. They never made it public but everyone knew they were lovers, no need to make a public statement about it. It was so obvious how Kaz would blush hard whenever he saw Ocelot. Or how Ocelot’s grey eyes would lighten up and fix on Kaz, who would make him forget about everyone else around him, definitely the blonde commander was his whole world.

It was harder and harder to stay away from each other, they were tired of pretending. The staff would often see them leaning on a veranda watching the sunset, or enjoying walks and rides through the different platforms of mother base. Ocelot would take Kaz for a ride so he could feel the wind on his face again. The only two times when his hair was wilder was thanks to the wind and thanks to Ocelot’s hands working on him while they fucked.

Like this time, Ocelot placed himself on top of Kaz and grabbed the back of his hair, pulling him into a kiss. And when he finally entered inside him, Kaz felt a mix of pain and pleasure, that familiar feeling which always left him breathless, but it was also like a drug. Something only Revolver Ocelot could make him feel, no one else had been able to make him feel that way. At first when they met it was only sex, mixed with a strong mutual attraction - some people would call it chemistry- but either way Kaz was now letting Ocelot break all his defences and have complete possession of his body, mind and heart too. Never in his life had he been able to experience this, to really make love with someone and to know that his love was reciprocal.

This time he didn’t hold back his moaning and made sure his lover really noticed he was having a good time thanks to him. But he couldn’t talk, part because he still kept some pride and wouldn’t openly admit how he loved having Ocelot inside him, putting pressure and pleasure in his inner walls, filling him with every inch while he came inside him. It made Kaz feel he belonged to him.

 

 

They spent several minutes in silence, just breathing and holding to each other’s bodies. Ocelot cuddling Kaz from behind, his nose buried in his blond hair, sniffing his familiar scent, it was addictive.

“Miller, I want you to be completely honest with me.” Ocelot’s words made Kaz turn around to face him, he was looking at the blonde with a rather sad look on his face.

If he wanted him to be honest, then it meant their game of saying the opposite or trying to taunt the other was not a valid option. Trying to adjust to this change, Kaz nodded with his head and waited for his lover to continue talking. He could still feel his hot cum dripping out of his body.

“What is it Adam?” Using his real name implied the highest level of intimacy between them, he was still trying to get used to saying his real name. Every time he pronounced it it felt less strange, Kaz was sure he would get used to it.

“Why do you stay?” Ocelot asked him suddenly.

“What… What do you mean?”

“Why are you still here? If you want to kill Big Boss, why are you still working for him?” Ocelot already knew the answer, but he wanted his lover to be honest about himself. It wasn’t because of revenge, not anymore.

Kaz took a moment to think while he dared to touch the Russian’s cheek, softly brushing his skin with his fingers, down to his jaw.

“Before you, I thought revenge was all I had left.” He began while his fingers moved to the other man’s neck. “I can’t do this any longer, you changed me. If you want me to be honest with you, I would like to run away… with you, forget all this shit and settle down somewhere far away from here, just you and me. It’s stupid I know it but I-” His hand now travelled to his chest but Ocelot stopped him grabbing his hand.

“Kaz” Ocelot moved on top of the younger man and leaned his elbow on the mattress while he grabbed Kaz’s hand, entangling their fingers. “What you ask is not stupid. ln fact, I want to live with you the rest of my life, and I…” Ocelot was deciding if going on with his talk or not as Kaz was watching him with watery eyes. “I want to marry you…”  
He already knew Kaz’s answer, but waited for him to react and say something.

“You? Marry me? I thought you weren’t interested in that.” Kaz let go a false laugh, just to hide his surprise and happiness.

“What? You don’t want to marry me?” Ocelot smirked, expecting his soft taunt would get the answer he was waiting for.

“I do. You know it.”

Ocelot kissed his lips and Kaz opened his mouth to welcome his tongue. They kissed for a while and before they would get fired up again, Ocelot continued with the subject, now that his lover had finally opened up to him.

He grinned and sat on the bed, then opened the drawer of his nightstand knowing Kaz was watching him curiously.

“I can’t believe it Ocelot, you wanna do it again?” Kaz leaned his head on his left hand while grinning. He thought Ocelot was looking for the lube probably.

“Would you believe me if I tell you that I already have the rings?”

Kaz blinked, still trying to figure out what was he talking about.

“Rings?”

“Come over here, sit on the edge.” Ocelot was too embarrassed to look at his face so he grabbed his lover’s hand softly and made him sit at the edge of the bed, placing his right foot on the floor. “Don’t say anything, let me do this like in those stupid movies you watch.” He continued while he kneeled in front of Kaz, who was speechless.

Clearing his throat, Ocelot continued. “Okay, I think it goes like this. Benedict Kazuhira Miller, w-would you marry me?”

After some seconds Kaz opened his mouth. “Y-you called me _Benedict_?”

“Isn’t it your full name?”

“Y-yeah… But just… It’s weird.” The blonde felt his face red while he looked down to the man kneeling before him, with a simple gold ring on his hand.

“Right then. Kaz, would you be my partner for life?” Ocelot took his hand and waited for his answer.

Kaz’s sight got blurred because of the sudden tears. “And you are naked…”

“Come on Miller, will you say yes?”

“I can’t believe you’re doing this…idiot…” Kaz was still looking at the ring, blushing hard. “Yes… Yes, I want to marry you.” He couldn’t wipe his tears out his face because Ocelot was holding his hand.

Kaz was amazed. Really Ocelot had thought of everything, he figured exactly the correct size of the ring and Kaz wondered what kind of intel did he do, how or when he obtained those rings. But his brain got him out of those suspicious thoughts as he focused on the man putting the ring on his finger.

He laughed softly but he suddenly talked with a confident voice, with a tone of warning.  
“Hey do you really know what you are doing, Revolver _Shalashashka_ Ocelot?”

The Russian replied to his taunt with another one “And do _you_? Commander Miller?”

Kaz contemplated the shiny ring on his hand.  
“This means you are mine, there’s no turning back now.”

Ocelot placed the other ring on the palm of his lover’s hand. “No turning back then. It’s not as if I wanna go back really.”

Kaz inspected the ring, it looked used. Without saying anything he put the ring on the Russian’s slim hand and wondered how such a tough gunslinger could have such handsome and slim hands.

 _Where did he get that ring?_ He wanted to ask but decided it was not the time.

“Aren’t we supposed to take vows or something like that?” Ocelot asked seriously and Kaz laughed, it was cute to see a person like Ocelot being serious about this, and it was a relief actually, that he really meant it.

“I just know about weddings by watching movies, don’t know what you’re supposed to say… Something like I, Kazuhira Miller, take you as my …-Kaz cleared his throat nervously- husband , don’t laugh at me, and I promise …to love you no matter what, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health…. until death do us part."

Ocelot was speechless for a moment while he held Kaz’s hand tighter.

“So, did I win your heart with that?” Kaz asked while he caressed Ocelot’s hand.

“I, Adamska, take you, Kazuhira Miller, as my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love and honor you all the days of my life.”

Both remained silent, neither of them could really believe it. Not even Ocelot who was the one who brought this up in the first place.

 

“So I guess... we are married now.” Ocelot placed his head on Kaz’s lap.

“Well… Not legally, men can’t marry.” Kaz looked at his hand with the ring and felt a little upset.

“Since when do you care about the rest of the world? Isn’t freedom what you are fighting for? Wasn’t this the dream you and Big Boss had?” Ocelot raised his head to look at his now husband, who frowned and grabbed his cheek.

“You want me to marry Big Boss instead?”

“Don’t be a fool Miller. I’m talking about something else, it’s related to marriage too, but I’m talking about Big Boss’s dream of building a new nation…”

Kaz was serious now but touched Adam’s face softly. “He changed, you know it Adamska. This is not the dream I wanted, you know what he did with Venom Snake is not fair… what he did to us…”

Ocelot raised to his feet and pushed Kaz to the bed. “He won’t hurt you ever again, I’m here now.”

Kaz gripped the Russian’s back, his nails digging on his skin. He was so mad at how things turned out, how his dream was destroyed by the person he thought was the love of his life, the one Kaz thought he would die with, Snake. But on the other hand he had to thank him, thanks to him he found out who his true love was.

“I won’t forgive you if you ever lie to me again.” Kaz hugged him, bringing their bodies even closer as if it wasn’t close enough.

Ocelot kissed his neck. “I took a vow to never lie to you again, you’re my husband now and I’ll protect you. Believe me Kaz.”

 

* * *

 

Ocelot opened the door of his lover’s office. They were able to keep their vow as a secret and they wore their gloves to hide their rings. It was normal for them to use gloves and no one would suspect. But they couldn’t stop the rumors about them growing bigger and bigger.

One of Miller’s bodyguards, Cow, stepped away when he saw Ocelot and softly told him that the commander had been down all day. “Please cheer up on him.”

Ocelot nodded and entered the office. Kaz was leaning on his chair looking at the window. The view of the sea was beautiful but Kaz didn’t seem to mind it.

“Venom Snake doesn’t listen to me anymore… He still thinks Big Boss’s right.” Kaz talked softly while he opened and closed his hand.

Ocelot leaned on the desk and placed a hand on his shoulder. “I know, he doesn’t talk to me either.”

“We can’t let him be out in the field for too long… Do you know where is he now? He hasn’t contacted me today.” Kaz was worried about V, it was normal for him to feel a connection with Big Boss’ phantom as they had been both deceived and toyed with.

Ocelot didn’t say anything and just listened to his partner rant about it.

“... Why don’t we leave the hell out of here already?” Kaz grabbed Ocelot’s shirt and made him look down at him.

“We have to wait, we can’t leave Venom Snake alone, not yet. Even if what Big Boss did to you too was unfair, I promise you Kazuhira, I’ll find a way for us to escape, but now is not the time.”

Kaz touched his eyes, trying to stop the tears running through his face but Ocelot grabbed his hand again and hugged him. “It’s okay Kaz, cry. Leave it all out.”

Ocelot kneeled and let Kaz bury his face on his chest, to cry. It hurted so much to see him like that, because Ocelot himself had also been responsible for pushing Kaz to the edge, he even threatened to kill him. All for a man who thought of them both as tools, as means to reach his objective. And was he really going  to give up everything, even the love of his life, just to help Big Boss achieve his dream? or was it a madness?

It didn’t matter now. He wanted to make it up to Kaz for everything. In the chaos of his broken mind, the only one who could save him was him, the man who was crying his heart out over his chest. That day when he asked him to marry him, he decided he would never hurt him again. He had to stick to that promise no matter what.

 

* * *

 

**1986 - Diamond Dogs Commander Miller's office.**

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Ocelot helped Kaz with his new prosthetic arm and touched his new arm. It wasn’t cold, this was a new technology developed by their Diamond Dogs’ Engineer who was rescued by Venom Snake two years ago, when all of this started. All this Big Boss’ army… The biggest ruse in history….

“Only if you are with me.” Kaz smiled and grabbed Ocelot’s hand with his two hands, the flesh one and the bionic new one.

The Russian smiled and grabbed two passports from Miller’s desk and put them on a backpack together with other important documents.

Kaz gave a quick look at his office and removed his beret, leaving it over the table with a letter addressed to ‘V’. He always knew this moment was going to arrive, there was no turning back now.

 

* * *

 

**1987 - Ushuaia, Argentina. At the world’s end**

 

Kaz leaned his head onto his husband’s shoulder while they waited sitting at a table of the small but cozy restaurant. It was spring but at the world’s end it was still cold and the snow was already a part of the normal landscape of the place.

Ocelot sighed and smiled when she sat at their table.

“You look handsome Kaz” Eva smiled warmly at the blonde. “I’m so happy to see you again.”

“Yeah, it’s been a long time.” Kaz now straightened up and took a sip of tea.

After some chit chat, Ocelot’s face hardened and Eva frowned.

“David’s in the US.” She said while she looked at the window.

“Why are you telling us this?” Ocelot leaned on his chair and grabbed Kaz’s flesh hand. Whenever he felt nervous, he would hold his lover’s hand, it calmed him.

“John wants to train him.” Eva continued, now looking at his old friend.

“He must be… 15 years old if I’m correct.” Ocelot held Kaz’s hand tightly while looking at Eva.

“Adam, I know you guys haven’t left all behind. You two know perfectly well what’s going on, even if you decided to step away…” Eva held tightly on her cup of coffee.

Kaz sighed and played with his spoon with his bionic arm for some seconds, considering the situation. “You want us to find him.”

Ocelot looked at Kaz surprised for a moment, but then he smirked.

 

* * *

 

**1989 - Christmas - somewhere in the world...**

“ _No matter what everybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world_.” David put on a serious face and quoted one phrase from the movie he had just seen while he walked alongside his two guardians and strolled some steps forward to look at them.

That night, Kaz and Ocelot took their newly adopted son, David, to the movies. They weren’t surprised when David chose to watch ‘ _Dead Poets Society._ ’ The boy was really one of a kind, sometimes so like his father and other times just so… Him. Definitely, David was his own person.

“Why did we end up taking you to this movie?” Ocelot laughed while he looked at his husband, who was laughing at David.

“Change the world, huh? You still have a lot to learn young man.” Kaz put his teacher like voice while he held on Ocelot’s hand.

“And you are gonna teach me? Show me what you’ve got _Hell Master._ ” David taunted him with a grin on his face, the boy was looking for trouble.

Kaz ran to the boy and they exchanged some CQC moves, David ending up with his ass on the floor.

“Guess Santa’s not going to stop by our home tonight, huh? Both of you stop behaving like children.” Ocelot pushed Kaz to the floor next to David and they all laughed.

 

Suddenly, DDog ran to Kaz and David, barking at them and wagging his tail.

“What’s all that noise?” A man went outside holding a spoon with his red bionic arm.

“Uncle V! I have to tell you about the movie, it was amazing! If you want I can go with you So you can watch it too!” David got up and ran to Venom Snake, who patted his head.

“Have you gotten taller?” V smiled and went inside, David and D Dog following him.

 

Ocelot extended his hand to Kaz, who was still on the floor rubbing his cheek trying to clean the dog’s saliva from his face.

“Come here honey.” He smirked while he watched Kaz glaring at him and taking his hand.

With a quick movement, Kaz pushed Ocelot to the ground too and just when the blonde was gloating on his victory Ocelot pushed his back to the floor and kissed him.

No matter how many years they had been together, Kaz still blushed when Ocelot would kiss him suddenly. Trying to change the subject he glanced at their home.

“Do you think it was a good idea letting V cook dinner?”

Ocelot looked at their home and laughed. “Well, I think we should go and check what they’re up to, before they burn the kitchen.”

“Yeah, but before that…” Kaz grabbed Ocelot’s face and kissed him. The older man wrapped his hands on his husband’s waist and kissed him back.

"Woah no matter how old you get you still behave like two teenagers in love." Eva stood next to them making noise with her high heels and bags.

The happy couple and straightened their clothes.

“You are still ashamed of kissing me in front of them?” Ocelot whispered while he hugged him.

“Shut up Adam. Let me help you with your bags Eva. What the hell did you buy? This is so heavy." Kaz complained while the woman handed him a pile of boxes and bags.

"Stop complaining Kaz and give that cool arm of yours some good use." Eva even handed him her big purse and laughed hard.

 

 

Once Eva's stuff was dealt with, the three of them sneaked into the kitchen.

“Okay what do we have here?” Kaz crossed his arms while he watched V cutting vegetables and David helping him.

“Looks like we are in trouble V.” David joked.

“Let me help you before Kaz gets mad.” Ocelot removed his gloves and washed his hands, getting ready to help.

Instead of putting on a serious face, Kaz went behind Ocelot and gave a surprise kiss on his lips, making him drop the dish cloth he was using to dry his hands with.

It was definitely going to be a fun night.

 

They knew that there would come a time where they would have to stop Big Boss as his obsessive army continued to grow… Or even Eli, David’s twin who had survived and was presumably missing in action, but he would definitely seek either David or Big Boss to settle the score.

Until that time comes, they would continue to train David and themselves, not to lower their guard but trying to live a normal life.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you wonder about Ocelot's ring, I thought it could be something he kept as a memory of his mother, maybe I'll write something about it. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this!


End file.
